- It hurts to breastfeed. Even if your doing it right! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
- They will attempt to bite you.
- If you breastfeed long enough they will get teeth and the suffering starts all over again.
- If they don't roll off the changing table, couch or bed you will inevitably drop them at some point. Basically, you will be responsible for at least one mild concussion.
- In playing around with them you will most likely hurt them on accident. Don't fret we all do it. They are like jellyfish the first year.
- There will be spit ups that drench your entire body and even in your mouth. I don't recommend holding them above your head.
- You will feel like you will never get another good night sleep...you won't
- When changing their diaper you will be urinated on and shat upon
In the middle
- You will find yourself having ridiculous conversations with toddlers that do not exceed the 2nd grade in logic and intelligence. And you'll be the one that started it.
- You will have ridiculous arguments with your spouse about parenting. After the first child you join forces and turn on the children instead.
- You will be desperate at times for adult interaction to the point of exhausting a perfect stranger that foolishly asked "how are you."
- You will start to think that good night sleep might happen more than two nights in a row...it won't
In the end
I hope it never does end....Be fruitful and multiply everyone.